Divorce is a difficult topic no matter what your faith background (or lack thereof) is, but I think there is the added complexity for Catholics because of our firm belief of the indissolubility of marriage. Our natural response tends to be to avoid the topic altogether, but as a Church, we face a legitimate crisis of divorced Catholics. Though most people are aware of annulments, there is a lot of confusion surrounding them.
Enter Lisa Duffy’s fantastic resource Mending the Heart: A Catholic Annulment Companion. Duffy uses her own experiences of divorce, the annulment process, and remarriage to dispel common misconceptions about annulment and lovingly walks with Catholics considering an annulment.
Disclaimer: I received a copy of this book in exchange for my honest review. All opinions are my own.
There are a lot of great aspects of this book, but I think the best is the tone. This book was personal, vulnerable, and compassionate while acknowledging the seriousness of the matter. Duffy did an excellent job of balancing the personal and factual. She shared her own story and the stories of others while also citing Church documents. She simplified complex topics without diluting the truth of Catholic teaching. I really appreciate that she provided advice for friends and family members who have loved ones going through a divorce. Normally, I am not a fan of end of chapter recaps and questions, but I thought these were well done and incredibly appropriate for the style of the book.
There were a few things I didn’t like about the book. I felt like sometimes it got repetitive, but I also understand that this situation may require some persistent affirmations. It rubbed me the wrong way that she used a national tragedy – September 11 – and compared it to divorce. I am not trying to undermine the very real suffering people who go through divorce experience, but I felt like it was a little insensitive. I was also concerned about an omitted detail. I loved that she recommended the sacrament of reconciliation, but it would’ve been prudent to warn remarried Catholics who haven’t gotten an annulment for their first marriage that they cannot receive absolution if they do not have any intention of changing their situation.
Despite these flaws, I genuinely feel like this is a great book, and I highly recommend it.
